2008 Woodie Awards
WSU students talk about getting married in college
Students share their experiences and advice about weddings
Keith Swartz
Issue date: 1/24/07 Section: Opinions
Don't get married in college
Amanda Kauppila
Please do not consider marriage before graduating from college. I am speaking from experience. I eloped out of sheer rebellion, and straightened out when I came to my senses, a year later.
I am certain that there are some good "college-marriage" stories out there, but mine was not so good. After dropping out of school, working as a telemarketer, in fast food, and in a nursing home, I learned a few things.
College is a time to dedicate to yourself. The knowledge and skills a student acquires during their education will be the foundation for life. It's cheesy, but true.
If a person only does what is necessary to "get by," instead of immersing themselves in the quest for knowledge, they will be at a disadvantage.
When people make a commitment to marriage, it becomes the top priority, as it should.
If a person is dedicating extra time to domestic life, they are taking away time that could be spent in school. This undermines their foundation, and a lot of people drop out of school.
Women have not always had the right to attend college; in our foremothers' tireless efforts to ensure that women of our generation would have access to education, are we going to snub our noses and forget about college because we've gotten married?
My mother remembers a professor (at Wright State) in the 1970s who would not give passing grades to women because he said that women did not belong in the business world. Today, we do not face such overt discrimination, so take pleasure in finishing school.
If, after completing a college education, a woman decides to stay home with her children, I see that as a noble choice. By finishing college, she has demonstrated that she has the capacity to uphold a commitment.
I do strongly believe that she will be a more effective mother if she first completes her education. Furthermore, should she find a need or desire to re-enter the workforce, she will have a degree.
From an economic standpoint, a lot of people around the world, both male and female, cannot attend college because of cost. If you're able to go to college, that is a blessing. Please don't throw it away because you decided you couldn't wait to get married for a few years.
Women, if you drop out because you found your M.R.S., you will be perpetuating the genius of patriarchy.
A man has convinced you that you do not need to be held accountable to society; thus, forcing your dependence on him. This gives him a position of power, and it puts you in a position of submission. Our grandmothers would be ashamed. Postpone marriage at least until after the graduation.
Waiting until after college is the best idea
Justine Ames
When I got engaged last June I had approximately nine months until my graduation. My fiancé and I decided to set the date for almost a year after my graduation. For many, this seems like a long engagement, but the factors that we had to consider seemed to be endless.
With all the activities that I am involved in at Wright State, it seemed that no time would be available for planning such an event while still in school. I also wanted to get my career started after graduation so that I would have some vacation time built up for a honeymoon.
The other factor that we considered was the season for the wedding. I have always wanted a winter wedding so it just seemed appropriate to wait until the winter season following my graduation.
As my graduation comes closer, I know that we have made the correct decision for us. I have just started a full-time job and life is more hectic than ever.
When our wedding does take place next January, I know that we will be a lot less stressed because we will be set in our normal routine. I feel that this will make the event more relaxed and enjoyable for our family and friends and more memorable for us in the years to come.
Maturity more important than age when considering marriage
Lindsey Fultz
Getting married in college isn't the problem, it's the people who get married in college that are the problem.
I don't see why people make such a big deal about getting married in college. I am twenty-two years old and I got married my sophomore year of college. Miraculously, my husband and I are still happily married.
I don't think that getting married is necessarily a matter of age, but maturity. I don't agree with the idea that being in college means being too young to get married. Getting married has little to do with age.
Maturity is an important thing that every couple needs to get married, not just couples in college. One thing that most couples don't realize is that not every day will be as blissful as your wedding day. A lot of young couples want to give up after the honeymoon stage wears off. This is where being mature is important.
Young married couples have to realize that there will be disagreements that are a lot more serious than any disagreement that they had when they dated. The important thing is not to give up. My marriage is doing great because my husband and I have realized this.
I'm not saying that all college students are ready for marriage. In fact, most probably aren't.
I don't think that the students who party every weekend and take advantage of their grandparents by using their fake deaths to get out of class are ready for marriage. If someone can't handle going to their classes in college, how are they going to handle a commitment like marriage while in college?
Some people just aren't ready yet, and that is okay. Some people feel that college is for having fun and not having commitments, which is fine, but those people shouldn't get married in college.
Amanda Kauppila
Please do not consider marriage before graduating from college. I am speaking from experience. I eloped out of sheer rebellion, and straightened out when I came to my senses, a year later.
I am certain that there are some good "college-marriage" stories out there, but mine was not so good. After dropping out of school, working as a telemarketer, in fast food, and in a nursing home, I learned a few things.
College is a time to dedicate to yourself. The knowledge and skills a student acquires during their education will be the foundation for life. It's cheesy, but true.
If a person only does what is necessary to "get by," instead of immersing themselves in the quest for knowledge, they will be at a disadvantage.
When people make a commitment to marriage, it becomes the top priority, as it should.
If a person is dedicating extra time to domestic life, they are taking away time that could be spent in school. This undermines their foundation, and a lot of people drop out of school.
Women have not always had the right to attend college; in our foremothers' tireless efforts to ensure that women of our generation would have access to education, are we going to snub our noses and forget about college because we've gotten married?
My mother remembers a professor (at Wright State) in the 1970s who would not give passing grades to women because he said that women did not belong in the business world. Today, we do not face such overt discrimination, so take pleasure in finishing school.
If, after completing a college education, a woman decides to stay home with her children, I see that as a noble choice. By finishing college, she has demonstrated that she has the capacity to uphold a commitment.
I do strongly believe that she will be a more effective mother if she first completes her education. Furthermore, should she find a need or desire to re-enter the workforce, she will have a degree.
From an economic standpoint, a lot of people around the world, both male and female, cannot attend college because of cost. If you're able to go to college, that is a blessing. Please don't throw it away because you decided you couldn't wait to get married for a few years.
Women, if you drop out because you found your M.R.S., you will be perpetuating the genius of patriarchy.
A man has convinced you that you do not need to be held accountable to society; thus, forcing your dependence on him. This gives him a position of power, and it puts you in a position of submission. Our grandmothers would be ashamed. Postpone marriage at least until after the graduation.
Waiting until after college is the best idea
Justine Ames
When I got engaged last June I had approximately nine months until my graduation. My fiancé and I decided to set the date for almost a year after my graduation. For many, this seems like a long engagement, but the factors that we had to consider seemed to be endless.
With all the activities that I am involved in at Wright State, it seemed that no time would be available for planning such an event while still in school. I also wanted to get my career started after graduation so that I would have some vacation time built up for a honeymoon.
The other factor that we considered was the season for the wedding. I have always wanted a winter wedding so it just seemed appropriate to wait until the winter season following my graduation.
As my graduation comes closer, I know that we have made the correct decision for us. I have just started a full-time job and life is more hectic than ever.
When our wedding does take place next January, I know that we will be a lot less stressed because we will be set in our normal routine. I feel that this will make the event more relaxed and enjoyable for our family and friends and more memorable for us in the years to come.
Maturity more important than age when considering marriage
Lindsey Fultz
Getting married in college isn't the problem, it's the people who get married in college that are the problem.
I don't see why people make such a big deal about getting married in college. I am twenty-two years old and I got married my sophomore year of college. Miraculously, my husband and I are still happily married.
I don't think that getting married is necessarily a matter of age, but maturity. I don't agree with the idea that being in college means being too young to get married. Getting married has little to do with age.
Maturity is an important thing that every couple needs to get married, not just couples in college. One thing that most couples don't realize is that not every day will be as blissful as your wedding day. A lot of young couples want to give up after the honeymoon stage wears off. This is where being mature is important.
Young married couples have to realize that there will be disagreements that are a lot more serious than any disagreement that they had when they dated. The important thing is not to give up. My marriage is doing great because my husband and I have realized this.
I'm not saying that all college students are ready for marriage. In fact, most probably aren't.
I don't think that the students who party every weekend and take advantage of their grandparents by using their fake deaths to get out of class are ready for marriage. If someone can't handle going to their classes in college, how are they going to handle a commitment like marriage while in college?
Some people just aren't ready yet, and that is okay. Some people feel that college is for having fun and not having commitments, which is fine, but those people shouldn't get married in college.
